Monday, February 21, 2011


Our homestudy was this past Thursday afternoon (it was supposed to be Sunday, but praise the Lord she had an early openning for Thursday and we jumped on it)!  She spoke with me alone, Jason alone, with the kids, and then all of us as a family.  With the kids, she asked what they thought he would look like (Caleb said blue skin, that's about par for Caleb :), she explained to them that he won't know what sharing is yet (simply because he has nothing to share), and explained to them that he will need a lot of special attention from mommy and daddy for the first month or so.  I've been putting off writing this because my mind has been spinning with thoughts and information (in a good way).  Wow!  When our adoption social worker left, that was the first thing that came into my mind.  Wow!  Good wows and sad wows.  Good, in that she gave us A LOT of great information, tips, and a couple of books we should try to read.  Sad, in that she gave us a general overview of what his life and living conditions are like right now.  In an orphanage in Ethiopia, it's likely that he shares a bed with 2 other kids and a room with 8-10 other kids; eats a "meal" once per day possibly every other day; has no knowledge or experience of hygiene as running water is scarce; could have a great fear of dogs since dogs in ET are guard dogs and not pets; wears whatever clothes are available whether girls or boys (I've been seeing this in pics of the "waiting children" from our agency); and what I'm thinking about most.....ATTACHMENT.  Here is a picture of what she explained COULD very likely happen
(reactive attachment disorder):

As opposed to this, what normally happens:

Basically, his needs are met on an inconsistent basis (because there aren't enough orphanage workers) and there are many different caregivers so there is not one in particular that is attuned to him.  So, instead of learning that he can trust adults, he learns to distrust and that he must be in charge and take care of himself.  Job #1 for us is to form the attachment with him.  "Teach/convince" him that we are forever; that we love him; we aren't going to leave him; we will take care of him.  For the first month to 6 weeks Jason and I are to be the only ones to feed him, bathe him, change him/take him potty, and put him to bed.

So, our prayer now is that God would start to prepare him and his heart for the love and care we are going to give him.  That he can receive it and trust it!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Like, what a bummer, like for sure!

uggghhh!  Another snow day. 4 last week; 53 degrees yesterday; snow, rain, and 17 degrees last night. Not only are there 5 kids in our apartment, but more importantly our home study was supposed to be today and we have to reschedule:( AND, she is booked all next week:(  So, we wait until the 20th.  We need our home study to be completed, not only to finish out our dossier, but to apply for grants you must have a home study report.  Our t-shirts were also supposed to arrive today, but just got an email from UPS saying "delayed delivery b/c of inclement weather".  In the meantime, I recently saw this video and read this quote from Mother Teresa:

 "We think sometimes that poverty is
only being hungry, naked, and homeless.
The poverty of being unwanted,
unloved, and uncared for is the
greatest poverty."   -Mother Teresa